Exhilarating Mahaloness

In the city a million things bug me. Along the shore of the Athabasca, majestic by zero stretch of the imagination, here along the rivers edge clear I am. My time so far with this group has been exhilarating, simply put. Coming here I had been through my fair share of ups and downs, I was dealing with my life back in the city, my gypsy life, I came to Athabasca by suggestion, a few emails and a meeting later, a car ride and a few other things in between and this is where I am. It is a blessing that I am here. Around me there are many things going on, a film crew, a fellow co star I have not known for very long at all, and on my mind my gypsy lifestyle and somewhat complete and utter stubbornness to make art, no matter what, all of it is lovely. I listen to Cal speak of the land, his life, this place, it’s history, and the fog I carried from the city in my head begins to dissipate. I am experiencing curiosity, like being a kid again when I would ‘get’ lost in the forest, roaming around, naive to the dangers, they didn’t exist, and here I stand in a forest thicket, and a similar feeling. Fearlessness. I enjoy the edge, being on the edge and occasionally going past personal comfort zones because thats when the magic happens. It is not something I want to condone, I have had my fair share of hardships, danger, and tests. In one way or another those tests brought me here, standing here in the forest with Ania and Calvin, we walk on and Calvin leads us to a burial ground, upon first glance it looks like a group of fences that were left here, Cal explains where we are, it is a burial ground of a group of First Nations people, I am silent. There really are no words to describe the sensation I felt as I touched a tree growing from one of the grave sites, I placed my hand on it and connected with the tree, a tree that is connected to the grandfather who was laid to rest underneath.
Note: I want to say a lot about this part but I find it difficult to find the right words, only because it is my experience, I don’t really know what everyone else felt, I forgot about myself, my bullshit, and was present, these are the moments I live for, they never last long, they are the unexpected and turn out to be defining moments along my path.

We reunited with the the rest of the crew, who I will say are very Mahaloness. Here in the forest, everyone with a different story of why they are here, they created their own stories, yet here we stand in this place, together, without judgements, new people brought together, and that’s why life is truly a beautiful thing. Nothing else up this moment in my life seemed very important, I was just happy to be present. We soon headed to Cal’s place, and one of the nest entrances I have seen in a while, a dandy and a separate blog entry, foto special. This place reminds me of a dream I once had of settling in or near a forest, next to the water, and the when that time comes and my dream transforms into reality I will smile and remember these moments, the ones that got me through the times when life didn’t seem so beautiful, we all know those ones….

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